Santa

Tonight H asked me, point-blank: "Is Santa real?" And I totally dodged by asking, "what do YOU think?"
She said, "well, they said in that movie that the parents just eat the cookies, but that would be so mean."
"Yeah," I said, "mommy and daddy aren't THAT mean, are we?"
"No, if you were doing that, you'd probably be just going to work and shooting everybody there."
So, though logic and reasoning, her parents aren't shooting up their workplaces, ergo Santa is real.
#howmuchlonger #iwanthertobelieve #butseriouslythisisridiculous

Career goals

H: "I want to be a teacher when I grow up because Mrs. R got a bunch of presents on her birthday, and I don't know another job where you get presents on your birthday. I mean doctors might not even see a sick person on their birthday."

“I have bad news...

...My Spanish teacher got a paper cut."

Scary story feedback from a former English teacher

Feedback from Molly Getz on H's scary story: 

Omg. I definitely watched the entire 10 minutes and was 100% captivated and laughing out loud!

Some notes:
- what an actress! She has a sense of pacing and intonation, and so expressive!
- great cinematography- she really worked a couple of different camera angles! 
- love the allusions to other fairy tales!
- effective use of repetition: “Do you really want to know?” Girl’s got a style and understanding of how to create a mood. 
- I am mostly impressed how she could keep track of her story during the interruptions from her brother and still be coherent. 
-  I always love a good surprise ending. Who knew we would end up in space?!

Thanks for sharing! I needed a good smile :)

Silly mommy

When E woke up struggling to breathe while we were camping:
M: H, just go back to sleep, I'm taking your brother to the doctor because he's having trouble breathing.
H: But mommy, there's no doctors in the woods!

Shoes

Today in the car on the way home from school: "Mommy, why do you buy me boys' shoes?" Me: "I thought you liked those shoes." Response: "I do, but, I also like a splash of color. I'm not the kind of girl you are."

I know, H, I know.

A little bit of knowledge is a dangerous thing

H: "What if there are dinosaurs still living in Spain?"
M: "There aren't."
H: "But what if there WERE?"
M: "Then I'd be scared and I'd try to protect you."
H: "I know what to do. If they're meat eaters, we'll just get some meat and throw it into outer space and then they'll get stuck in a black hole and we'll say haha."

Being a 6 year old must be confusing.


Sent from my iPhone

Let's get our priorities straight

H, watching The Little Princess: She's going to be happy there. Her bedroom is even better than mine! Except for no dollhouse. And not organized.

That’s the plus from my school!

H, upon seeing a cross outside a church

Plurals

M reads a trivia question: If the plural of mouse is mice, what is the plural of goose?
H: Ducks?

She's got a point.

H: If you're not allowed to talk to strangers, how can you ever meet anyone?

Brain Quest

Yesterday, H got a trivia game from school called Brain Quest. It's a stack of cards with questions in various academic categories that's designed for 3rd graders. She doesn't want to do ANYTHING ELSE. Last night she quizzed Grammy over Facetime until my mom surrendered. This morning she said, "I'm going to quiz Daddy on the way to school until his head pops off!" These are actual texts I got from T this morning:

T: Pretty sure H would have been happy with an SAT prep book for her birthday.
T: Halfway to school I asked if we could play the quiet game. She spent the rest of the time explaining the rules.
T: If quizzing causes heads to pop off I suspect our daughter will be accused of mass murder by noon.

mathematician

My daughter, the kindergartener, just riffing in the bath tonight: "Mommy, I know 5 times 2, I learned it at school. It's 10. And 6 times 2 is 12. Because 5+5 is 10 and 6+6 is 12. If I know a number I can find its double. So 10 times 2 must be 20. And 10 times 3 is 30." I love how much she loves math. #takesafterherdaddy #maybehermamatoo #littlemathematician#littlemonster

H made me a coloring page this morning.

Then she coached me to realize her artistic vision.

A new Mother’s Day tradition?

Some busy tooth fairies around these parts!

Of all the places in the world....

What is she learning at that school?

Rough day

H: Do you know why today was kind of a rough day for me?
M: No, why?
H: Because my dogs moved houses today, see, they live there now. [Points out all the new accommodations, including a separate loft for the parents, a box for the kids to sleep in and a book to read.] And I have to move all their furniture. So that's why it's been a rough day.

TGIFT!

H tonight before bedtime: "Thank goodness it's Friday tomorrow!"

I think this new phrase could really catch on.

The things I have invented

https://youtu.be/8yfHXvIZrPA

 Do yourself a favor and dedicate two minutes to this video.

I think it’s a multi-story dog house

When water spills on your library book

A recent family portrait, by H

Just look at the curls in E's hair! The only real inaccuracy is daddy's clean shaven face.

Lawn games!

Too cool for school

To bed early

H: "Every morning after a Friday I'm so tired, so I'm going to go to bed right after dinner tonight. If there's anything you want to do with me, get it done before dinner."

After dinner shenanigans

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Guided Reading

H: Can I tell you something? At school, my favorite part is when you get to go to the rainbow table. It's better than when it says: "blue drawer" or "red drawer." It's called "Guided Reading" and you sit with the teacher and the teacher tells you things. I love it!

Based on my extensive educational expertise, I am guessing there are independent worksheets in the blue and red drawers to keep the other kids occupied while the teacher works with a differentiated small group at the rainbow table. It's awesome to watch her excitement for learning.

Ladybug pet

Just take a minute to investigate the details, including the remote control, the extra books to read, the water to drink, the fruit shelves, and the light switch. Later versions also included a staircase between the levels.

Smart

H: Mommy, look! I put the little guy on the car! The book didn't even think of that!
M: Wow! That's awesome! That's because you're S-M-A-R-T...
H: Amazing!
M: ...
Still working on the spelling...

Sent from my iPhone

Visit to a farm!

The kids got to ride a donkey and see a long-haired cow, an alpaca and a Vietnamese pot-bellied pig named Spike. Their favorite part? Petting the dogs, of course. Might as well have stayed in the city. Lol.

Fun with grandparents in MA

Joanna Stone: Fun with grandparents in MA  View photo You received this mail because Joanna Stone shared these photos with you. If you no longer wish to receive email notifications of shared photos, unsubscribe here. Get the Google Photos app Google LLC 1600 Amphitheatre Pkwy Mountain View, CA 94043 USA

In the jungle

Pulling up the driveway to GamGam and Dibby's house, E says, trembling, "I'm scared of tigers in the jungle!" Little did he know we'd find a snake on our mini-hike just hours after arriving!

When H is not in school

She makes school at home

Best part of today: finally getting to do this girl’s student-led parent-teacher conference. She’s been eagerly anticipating it all week. The teacher had all great things to say and H was so proud of herself. I love how much she loves learning.

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#tomatobath

While watching a dump truck video, H farted. It was obnoxiously stinky. Like adult-level funk. After E and I exclaimed in disgust, she quipped proudly, "It's like I'm a skunk!"
#herfathersdaughter #noshame #whenallyoueatischeese

Luckiest mom ever

These two played so contentedly on their own/together tonight. Extreme dot-to-dot for H and big floor puzzle for E. The some big box fun!

H made a puzzle of our family. We just cut it out and glued it to cardstock. #creativityfordays #wheredoesshegetit

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Check out this movie poster H made tonight. “Monster Danger... it’s on Netflix... it’s a movie!” #imgoingtocallyouababy #didsomeonesaymonster #ohno

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Is it close to Valentine's Day?

H: Is it close to Valentine's Day? M: Yes, it's about two weeks away. H: Because you don't have very much candy yet... #shescatchingon #highexpectations On January 31, 2018 at 07:36PM

The Questions

Prompted by a friend on Facebook, I asked H these questions about Mommy and Daddy tonight. Her answers had us crying with laughter.

Hope, age 5.5

What is something I say a lot?

M: "The bathroom is yours, Hopey!"

D: "Don’t forget your gloves!" Well, he said that one time.

What makes me happy?

M: Watching me and Elliot play

D: Putting me and Elliot to sleep

What makes me sad?

M: Seeing me fall off a swing.

D: I've never seen Daddy sad.

How tall am I?

M: [She made me stand up and take off my shoes to do the measurement, which she accomplished by running her hand up me while counting.] 22. [I asked 22 what?] 22 pounds.

D: Usually dads are taller so maybe he’s 60.

What's my favorite thing to do?

M: Sit down and read books

D: Build a snowman. I never saw him do that, but I can’t think of anything else.

What is my favorite food?

M: Salad.

D: Salad?

What is my favorite drink?

M: Milk

D: I can’t think of it but it’s a parent food.

If I could go anywhere, where would it be?

M: Camping

D: Running

Do you think you could live with out me?

M: No

D: No

How do I annoy you?

M: I don’t know any reason.

D: He doesn’t annoy me.

What is my favorite TV show?

M: Spongebob

D: He told me he likes Spongebob.

What is my job?

M: Being a parent. [When prompted] You’re a teacher too.

D: I don’t know.

How old am I?

M: Maybe 32?

D: [With certainty] 62

What's my favorite color?

M: Orange

D: Umm. I don’t know.

How much do I love you?

M: A million

D: A billion

H’s school has a “no homework” policy in the early grades. So she made her own. And completed it. “What is the difference between this one and this one?” #growinguptoofast #miniteacher

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